SATIRE: BOMBSHELL: Adam Schiff announces new indisputable evidence of Trump-Russia Collusion

Trump and Putin

BOMBSHELL: Adam Schiff announces new indisputable evidence of Trump-Russia Collusion

Carlos Delicto, Reporting from the Swamp

California Congressman Adam Schiff stated during a brief presser in the Capital Building, where he is spending the holidays preparing for Trump’s impeachment trial in the Senate, that he has new, uncontested evidence of Trump-Russia Collusion.

He referred to the report of a recent telephone call between the two men that posted on the Gateway Pundit.

“Russian President Vladimir Putin is thanking President Donald Trump for a phone call in which the US president shared intelligence that has prevented terrorist attacks planned for New Years Eve in Russia.

In a phone call initiated by Russia, the Kremlin said that a ‘range of issues of mutual interest’ were discussed, including information that lead to the arrests of two Russian citizens who were plotting the terror attacks.

On Sunday, Putin’s office released a statement thanking President Trump ‘for the transfer, through special services, of information allowing the prevention of terrorist acts in Russia.’”

In his statement Schiff read before a press gaggle of thirty-something eager Democrat operatives pretending to be real journalists, Schiff said,

“This coordination between Trump and Putin further confirms the collusion between Trump and Russia that began long before Trump took the oath of office.  I’m not suggesting that the President didn’t help Putin catch a couple of bad guys.  But that was just a cover story for their contact. It’s the reference to ‘mutual interest’ that requires further investigation by the House of Representatives. And, we need to know just what are the “special services’ mentioned in the transfer of information between Trump and Putin.  Do they have a secret, dedicated phone line that is unmonitored by the NSA? We’re one-hundred percent sure they have a special handshake used when they meet in public that signals when one or both of them wants to have an off-the-record conversation.  In a recent photo of the two leaders (seen above), Putin is using a special hand signal (right thump pointed up) to tell Trump he has some further information on Democrats to share in order to strengthen Trump’s 2020 campaign. And the way Trump connects his hands means that he agrees to get together with Putin in a private discussion as soon as he can break free of the media and his handlers.”

Schiff ended his short announcement without taking questions. But there didn’t appear to be any as the gaggle hurried off to file their stories on new collusion evidence.